homestuckfateeditionfandomcom-20200214-history
102415-Cultural Exchange
angryGardener AG began trolling cascadingCourtier CC at 22:04 -- AG: hey, Nyarla CC: Oh CC: Mike, right? AG: So, about that whole end of the world thing CC: What do you think? AG: It's honestly really depressing CC: Yeah, sorry about that, actually CC: Kinda crushed my spirit when I wasp learning about it AG: Is there any way to save the Earth? CC: I don't think so CC: My planet will be destroyed too CC: From what I've heard, there's nothing that can be done AG: Who even told you this? CC: Some kind of interdimensional being CC: A third species CC: Who's already gone through this before AG: Name? CC: Libby CC: I mostly call her The Oracle CC: Just because it's how she wasp introduced to me AG: Seems kinda sketchy CC: Indubitably AG: Why did you contact me? CC: It wasp to check out the competition, maybe try to intimidate you a bit CC: Simply because I wasp contacted and subsequently threatened by Jack CC: And since then, I'd been thinking you all were informed on us and prepared AG: We weren't CC: Yeah, I see that now CC: Jack wasp holding out on you CC: Not that he's trustworthy anyway CC: Not even for you CC: If you want proof though CC: Talk to Arch CC: I hear he's been up to some uhh, shenanigans CC: That have to do with this AG: Well, Jack's just a kid, right? CC: Hell no CC: Jack's the same species as the Oracle AG: What? CC: Yeah CC: Jack's an alien CC: A malicious one form what I've heard AG: WHAT THE FUCK CC: I mean, he told me that we'd have a battle between our species CC: So we've been clawing at information on you all CC: At least I have CC: In preparation to maybe kill you AG: Oh, c'mon man AG: You wouldn't kill me, right? CC: I would have CC: If I waspn't convinced you're actually innocent CC: Killing isn't at all out of the ordinary on my planet AG: That's kinda fucked up CC: What? Do you live in some kind of bloodshedless utopia? AG: Yeah CC: Seriously? AG: Yes CC: Huh CC: wow CC: Maybe you humans did something right AG: We have wars, sure, but we don't just randomly kill people AG: Well, some of us do AG: But they're put in jail AG: Some put to death CC: Huh, good for you all CC: I don't care for the needless killing CC: Enemies only AG: Hm CC: I mean, I avoid it whenever possible CC: Avoid fighting in general whenever possible AG: That's good to hear AG: So if we were just in the game hanging out, you wouldn't kill me? CC: Be warned though, things will be dangerous when the game begins CC: I've resigned to the thought that it may be necessary CC: For the sake of survival CC: You have to do what you have to do when you're protecting the last of your species AG: So, you would kill me? CC: I will try to avoid it if it's any consolation AG: Okay AG: That's good to hear AG: I'll probably come out of the game either dead or an innocent CC: Let's just hope you comb out of it at all, yeah? AG: There is no way I'm killing anyone CC: I don't know what'll happen in there CC: But best of luck to you AG: You too CC: Thank you AG: Hey, what is your culture like? CC: Violant and oppressive CC: Yours? AG: Civil and kinda judgemental AG: How does you empress look like? CC: Well, like most trolls CC: Grey skin CC: Horns and claws CC: She has a fuckton of hair CC: And bad fashion sense, hehe AG: How do you look like? CC: Kinda of the same CC: Less hair CC: More horn CC: Better fashion CC: Not really, "tall" CC: but above average height CC: Granted CC: I don't know what height ranks as average CC: for you AG: For males about 5'11 AG: I think AG: Could you send me a pic of your species? CC: Uhh, yeah, sure -- cascadingCourtier CC sending file threshprince.jpg -- CC: It's one of our most famous actors -- angryGardener AG recieves file -- AG: Holy shit AG: Is that AG: Will smith? AG: That is Will Smith CC: What? CC: You know about Troll Will Smith? CC: I know he's famous, but wow -- angryGardener AG sending file freshprince.jpg -- CC: Whoa CC: How the hell? AG: I DON'T FUCKING KNOW CC: We both have a Troll Will Smith? CC: What are the odds? AG: He's just called Will Smith here CC: Huh, weird CC: And kinda cool we have a parallel AG: Yeah AG: This is so fucking weird CC: Talk about a cultural exchange -- angryGardener AG sending file obama.jpg -- AG: There's a picture of a human that probably isn't over on Alternia AG: He's also the president AG: Of the United States CC: Yeah, I don't think we have one of those CC: This is your ruler? AG: Not really a ruler, but yeah AG: We have a bunch of things that look after America -- cascadingCourtier CC sending file herimperiouscondescension.png -- CC: That's what our ruler looks like AG: She looks like a bitch CC: Pfft, totally CC: The hugest AG: Is she like, a dicktator AG: I'm sorry I mean, dictator CC: An Empress CC: She's been ruling longer that I've been alive AG: No congress, none of that? CC: Longer than my ancestor probably CC: Congress? AG: I'll take that as a no AG: Also, are you guys fucking TURTLES or something? CC: Well she rules with absolute power if that's what you mean CC: Turtles? AG: Turtles are slow moving creatures that can live up to 150 years AG: And they don't do shit CC: What are years? CC: Wait CC: Like, solar cycles? CC: I guess AG: Yes CC: As far as aging goes CC: We have sweeps here CC: And our empress has been around for thousands AG: And she rules with absolute power? CC: She's the highest blood caste of fushia CC: They have the highest innate physical strength and the longest life spans AG: Bill Gates is the richest man on Earth, but he doesn't rule the world CC: Our empress rules the galaxy CC: Crushes all opposition under her heel AG: She doesn't rule Earth CC: She hasn't had time to get there probably AG: Do you know if a bullet to the head would kill her? CC: Probably CC: I pity the troll who tries CC: They'd have to get close to her first CC: PAst the swarms and swarms of imperial drones CC: And then loyalist highbloods CC: Who are also strong as fuck CC: And super skilled CC: Centuries of training under their belts AG: Would a nuclear explosion kill her, because that is one of the strongest weapons Earth has CC: Probably CC: She's not immortal CC: Just incredibly strong and skilled CC: With millenia of training CC: And armies CC: Lots of those CC: And a vicious streak longer than her own lifespan AG: I really want to meet this empress CC: I would hope with a nuclear bomb in your hand AG: Of course I would CC: Otherwise it would be certain death AG: A small fact about humans CC: Well, less "certain" and probably more torturous and slow CC: What fact? AG: We are very determined if we want to get shit done, we get shit done, if I want to kill this bitch, I will CC: Tell that to the Sufferer CC: And the Summoner AG: Who the hell is that? CC: And all the other revolutionaries wiped form the history books CC: The sufferer wasp a mutant insurgent CC: Who wanted peace between blood castes CC: He wasp crucified CC: The Summoner picked up where he left off CC: Onlt violently CC: I'm fairly sure he got even worse AG: That sounds like a less successful mix of Abe lincon and Jesus CC: I don't know who they are AG: Jesus is the messiah and Abe abolished slavery CC: Like, Mirthful Messiahs? CC: That subjugglator shit? AG: No, Jesus was killed but then came back to life, and to his killers he was just kinda like, "sup bros" CC: And slavery is most certainly still a thing in our empire CC: This Jesus sounds cool AG: Not over here AG: He is AG: Over here everyone is equal CC: Wow, you really do live in some kind of utopia CC: The system isn't too kind ot lowbloods AG: Sounds kinda like how the Whites were with Black people AG: Blacks were put to work on farms, not allowed to go to school, and most of the time were beaten to death AG: By their owners AG: Earth used to suck CC: Wow CC: Yeah, good job on that progress AG: Thank Abe and Martin Luthor King CC: They must've been brave humans AG: They were, but they were both murdered CC: Oh CC: Well, that's to be expected I guess AG: Yeah, but it still sucks AG: Now, what progess has your planet made? CC: Uhh, from planet to galactic empire? AG: Positive progess CC: Uhhh... CC: Well, the sufferer's message got across AG: How much? CC: Well, his teachings are around CC: Even the empress couldn't wipe them from the history texts CC: Except literally CC: Not in any history texts CC: Only word of mouth AG: How many people REALLY remember the Sufferer? CC: Maybe some violetbloods CC: I know the empress does AG: But do they REALLY care? CC: Well, they're the ones benefiting from his fall CC: So probably not AG: Exactly AG: EARTH IS FUCKING AWESOME CC: Yeah, sounds pretty nice AG: We have problems, sure, but compared to Alternia, HOLY SHIT AG: EARTH IS FUCKING HEAVEN CC: Maybe so CC: Enjoy your planetary pride CC: We only met because neither planet will last long CC: Maybe the new planets will be as nice as yours AG: Oh shit, I completely forgot AG: New planets? CC: Part of the game AG: What? CC: Our planets are destroyed CC: But all the players get a new one for themselves AG: I get a planet all to myself? CC: Uhh, as far as I know, yes AG: Awesome! AG: Just as long as I can breathe there, I'm happy CC: I would hope they have an atmosphere CC: That'd be really damn inconveniant if they didn't, hehe AG: Yeah CC: Even if they're not so good, we'll have plenty to choose from CC: Every player gets an entire planet CC: So there'd be twenty of them AG: I just hope that my planet is just as I imagine it CC: I would hope so AG: Now, tell me more about all the progress your planet has made in its lifespan CC: I really don't know what you expect to hear CC: I'll miss my old life CC: and my business CC: And friends CC: And all of that CC: But I'm so ready to restart the species with better values -- angryGardener AG sending file collectionofawesomeearthmemes.avi -- AG: That's going to take you a while to watch AG: Have fun with all the John Cena memes -- cascadingCourtier CC recieving file collectionofawesomeearthmemes.avi -- CC: ... CC: This is... CC: ... CC: Glorious? CC: Terrifying? AG: A strange mix of both, maybe? AG: Oh and just so you know that the Earth had serious issues CC: Wow, yeah -- angryGardener AG sending file donaldtrump.avi -- AG: This is the biggest ass hole on Earth -- cascadingCourtier CC recieving donaldtrump.avi -- CC: Okay ew CC: That's one ugly human CC: And...what's that one his head? AG: But that hair CC: Hair? AG: That is hair CC: Are you sure? AG: Yes CC: Terrifying AG: He spends three days combing it CC: He needs a few more weeks added to that AG: Yeah AG: Wanna see another fuck up? CC: That last one wasp terrifying CC: But I'm prone to morbid curiosity CC: What is it? -- angryGardener AG sending file mileycyrus.avi -- AG: Oh and just to add to the pain -- cascadingCourtier CC recieving file mileycyrus.avi -- -- angryGardener AG sending file kanyewest.avi -- AG: what'dya think? -- cascadingCourtier CC recieving file kanyewest.avi -- CC: I think your planet is less of a utopia than you let on AG: We have holograms -- angryGardener AG sending file hatsunemiku.avi -- -- cascadingCourtier CC recieving file hatsunemiku.avi -- AG: How do you feel about this? CC: Yeah, I think I've had enough of your culture CC: Thanks, hehe CC: Want from really good CC: To not not quite AG: I only showed you the bad parts -- angryGardener AG sending file inthearmsofanangel.avi -- -- cascadingCourtier CC recieving file inthearmsofanangel.avi -- CC: Oh, an audio file? AG: There should be pictures of dogs with music in the background CC: ... CC: why CC: why??? CC: It's... CC: It's so sad AG: It's okay AG: Let it all out CC: I'm a troll dammit CC: We're violent CC: And tough CC: And awwww AG: It's okay to cry CC: I'm not crying AG: Yes you are AG: It's okay CC: shut it, human AG: Just let it out -- angryGardener AG sending file sadcats.jpg -- -- cascadingCourtier CC recieving file sadcats.jpg -- CC: Oh comb on, Mike CC: Sad meowbeasts? AG: Yes AG: Sad, uh, meowbeasts CC: Yes CC: The quadrupedal mammals CC: the ones that go meow AG: Cats? -- angryGardener AG sending file howcanilivewithoutyou.avi -- -- cascadingCourtier CC recieving file howcanilivewithoutyou.avi -- CC: ... CC: Is this the Nic Cage human again? AG: No, just listen AG: don't look AG: Just let it all out CC: Not quite the same effect CC: He's really rugged though -- angryGardener AG sending file cutedisabledcanimals.jpg -- AG: What were you saying? CC: Okay, now you're just being mean -- cascadingCourtier CC changed their mood to DISCONTENT -- -- cascadingCourtier CC changed their mood to RELAXED -- AG: Yes AG: fuck AG: you AG: bro CC: What? CC: Not gonna get me down that easily AG: I got you down before AG: ADMIT IT CC: Psh, yeah suuuure you did AG: YOU CRIED CC: Can;t prove that AG: I'm sorry, I guess I just got carried away with showing you the good side of earth CC: Yeah CC: And then the dark side CC: And then the sad side -- angryGardener AG sending file starwars.avi -- AG: That is going to take you a while to watch AG: It's not sad AG: It's just awesome -- cascadingCourtier CC recieving file starwars.avi -- CC: I'll take your word for it CC: I'll have to watch it later though if it's too long CC: I'm on th road AG: To where? CC: About to go steal a dropship CC: Well, not really "steal" AG: Sure CC: It uhh, doesn't have an owner anymore AG: Yeah, I wonder why CC: Because my friends were in danger CC: That's why CC: And it's better of with us, anyway CC: We'll be traversing entire planets CC: A space ship is damn handy AG: So, you might stumble upon Earth? CC: Not likely CC: I mean when the game starts CC: Our hives will be transported to our planets CC: I figure if the ship is at my hive, it can be of use CC: In the Medium AG: That makes sense AG: Well, I should go CC: Ah, alright CC: be safe CC: Watch the skies AG: Later, bro AG: I will AG: Bye -- angryGardener AG gave up trolling cascadingCourtier CC at 00:27 -- Category:Nyarla Category:Mike